Saturday, January 31, 2009

Next to Godliness...

I just wasted 40 minutes on facebook doing one of those "25 Random Things About You" tags. If that doesn't sum up my lack of ambition for the day, I don't know what does.

I had a friend that I haven't seen in a long time and her kids over for a play date this morning. It was so great to see them again, to just hang out and catch up. It's amazing how much bigger her kids are now. We both moved to this area at the same time and it's hard to believe that it's already been more than 2 1/2 years that we've been here.... This was the first time that she'd been over to see our new house, so I had grand ambitions of everything being clean and tidy and perfect-looking. Despite my efforts to get things picked up, while the house wasn't disastrous, it wasn't exactly pristine either. I know her well enough that this shouldn't have been a big deal for me, but part of me still cringed at the remains of Jackson's breakfast on the floor and the miscellaneous rubble littering my countertops. I thought I had gotten past feeling like I have to have everything perfect to have someone over, but apparently some of that still likes to pop up now and then. I still struggle to find the balance between wanting to have things nice for visitors and the "well, this is my life" reality of having three kids. Luckily, she has kids herself and didn't seem bothered by it.

It's funny because I often feel more comfortable at someone's house that looks a little "lived-in" than one where everything is immaculate. I'm not as nervous about my kids and I don't feel as insecure about my own house when I see someone else whose house has evidence that people live there. So why do I think that other people are going to be bothered by the evidence that yes, I do have children, and yes, they make more messes than I can keep up with? I guess half of it is that I was trained you want things to look nice (out of respect for your guest) and half is just plain vanity- I want to look good and like I have everything perfect and under control. Which of course I ALWAYS do... just in case you were wondering. ;)

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