Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Embracing the Pooch

Hello, my dear family and friends, who lovingly submit to being sent my updates,

We've had a pretty normal week. I am trying to recuperate from being overbooked from a month straight, so I'm trying to be as lazy as possible. In the past week, despite my efforts toward my laziness goal, I actually have tried to cook some nice dinners, but in that time I have had two botched meals and one botched side dish, driving home the lesson that you should never let yourself slip when working toward goals. The second moral of the story is to never make Curried Chickpeas with sweet onions (not a strong enough flavor), never make chili with an unknown chili powder (mine had SALT in it-- double salted chili is not tasty), and don't try to make a gourmet vegetable cream soup with frozen veggies (picture an unappetizingly green watery soup with little vegetable lumps in it-- I didn't even show it to Jared, much less make him try it).

Jared, by the way, has the meanest mom in the world because instead of cooking say, Spaghetti and Meatballs, she feels a compulsion to try dishes like "Spinach Ricotta Pappardelle," "Chicken Breasts Meuniere," or "Green Beans Amandine." Never mind the fact that the "Meuniere" was basically a fancy name for schnitzel or that green beans with lemon juice and sauteed almonds are just about the best side dish around, as soon as Jared saw them he started wrinkling his nose and cringing with apprehension of the disgustingness awaiting him. Well, I have been feeling a little guilty about making all these new meals that are weird for the kids, so I decided to make something plain that they would like: sloppy joes. Unfortunately Jared decided that he didn't like sloppy joes either, so now he is emotionally wounded because I told him he had to eat his green beans and sloppy joe to have a dinner treat. He sat quivering in front of his plate for 20 minutes, trying to decide if it was worth ingesting such appalling foulness and putridity for the sake of a little ice cream. In the end, he nobly sacrificed the chance for ice cream to escape defiling his stomach. Yesterday we happened to have some Muenster cheese in the fridge, so I was eating a piece and offered a sample to Jared. He immediately started shaking and cringing, despite my assurances that it really was tasty. He finally was harassed into trying a piece and admitted it was only a little good.
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A little aside on the subject of cooking-- I finally found the answer to the question that kitchen philosophers the world over have debated. I have stewed and puzzled about how on earth one is supposed to keep a clean kitchen, especially if you have dish-doing disability like me. Even more puzzling is when I have diligently done the dishes and my kitchen is STILL a complete disaster. And then I had an epiphany-- the answer came so clearly and startling: THE SECRET TO HAVING A CLEAN KITCHEN IS TO NOT USE IT TO COOK. All of a sudden it all made sense. Unfortunately, that does make a kitchen a rather useless, although much more decorative, room of the house.

On Thursday last week, Camryn and I got to go to Jared's school for a special event: the wedding of Q and U. It was a special event, not soon to be forgotten, hosted by the two morning kindergarten classes. One class was "Q"s (Jared's) and the other class was "U"s. All of the kindergartners had the appropriate letter headband on. They had chairs set up outside for the parents and after the entrance of both classes a "Q" from one class walked down the aisle with a "U" from another class (preceded by a flower girl, of course). After the officiating official asked the two "letters" if they would always stand together in all words that say the sound "Qu," and they emphatically answered, "I Do," they had a recessional of both classes. Then each class and its visitors got to have wedding cake and punch in their classroom. This was the highlight of Jared and Camryn's week.

Camryn got to bring her bike to preschool on Thursday to go for a ride around the school. She said afterward, "Mom, we didn't ride away from the school, we just went around in a circle, over and over again." Jared begged and pleaded to go on the bike ride with Camryn's school. He even slyly got permission from Camryn's teacher and thought he had clinched it. But, alas for Jared, his vicious mother would not let him go home and get his bike so he could show all the preschoolers how much faster he was. I tried to explain to Jared that Camryn did not get to go on a field trip to the zoo or to Albertson's with Jared's kindergarten class, but he still was crestfallen. Poor Jared was forced to go to Linens and Things, a "boring store" that "doesn't have any fun stuff for kids." Despite its lack of fun stuff, he managed to find two neon colored balls with plastic spikes and bounced them around the entire store, narrowly escaping damaging multiple items in the process.

On Friday morning, I got a call from a friend who had 2 extra tickets to a Brad Paisley concert and wanted to know if Dave and I wanted to go. Yes! Of course!!!! Now, who is Brad Paisley, you may ask.... let me tell you.... I had no idea--- Dave and I had never heard of him either. Actually, I had heard my friend talk about him and that was the first I had ever heard of him. He is a (gulp...) country singer and a great guitarist. Despite the fact that Dave and I aren't super big country fans, we accepted the offer, went to the concert and had a great time. We got to see Jack Ingram--some guy/band from Austin, a 17 year-old singer-songwriter named Taylor Swift (we didn't actually get to hear her because there was a row of her fans right behind us screaming her songs and drowning her out), Kellie Pickler!!!! (definitely the highlight of the show... I've always been a huge fan of people who deserved to get voted off American Idol weeks before they actually did), and Brad Paisley, of course. Kellie Pickler actually wasn't as bad as I expected and Brad Paisley was downright GOOD. He was a great guitarist and had fun lyrics to his songs: like the one about how much cooler he is online-- he loses 20 pounds every time he logs in, the one about how his girlfriend told her she's leaving him if he goes fishing again- and he'll sure miss her, or the one called "Alcohol: the best times you'll never remember." So Dave and I were cultured in the ways of country and had a chance to pick up a Burgerville fresh strawberry milkshake on the way home. Score!

Saturday was devoted to working on the yard, taking Jared to T-Ball (30 minutes late, of course, because he had to have his room clean first), and going to a friends house to watch the Jazz game. Sunday involved waking up and madly rushing to bathe the kids, prepare for primary and get everyone out the door in time to rehearse with the choir before church.... only to find out when we got there that the choir number had been cancelled. I love it when that happens. I still hate our voice mail service because unless we happen to pick up the phone (which we apparently did not after we got home Saturday night) we don't know that we have any messages, no matter how relevant they may be.

Monday we prepared to kick off the summer with... clouds, grey skies, cold and Dave going in to work. Just the way to celebrate Memorial Day!! That afternoon, a friend and I took the kids on a trip to walk around the temple grounds. Luckily it warmed up and Dave got home in time for our yummy barbecue that evening.

In pregnancy news, I'm now officially 12 weeks and my baby is the size of a lime and two inches long... which I'm sure accounts for the extra two inches that have accumulated around my middle. My week of being the human-vacuum-cleaner has, thankfully, started to wear off and my appetite is returning to normal non-Dave levels. Earlier this week I was having a very hard time adjusting to my changing silhouette, it being that awkward phase where I don't look pregnant, I just look fat-- I mean, less trim-- in all my clothes with a little extra pudge in the middle-- like a guy who's had a few too many beers. I considered making an "I'm really not fat, I'm just pregnant" t-shirt and then thought better of it. I was moping and depressed, especially since this is only the beginning... I only get bigger from here-- and if it's anything like my last two, it will be MUCH bigger. Then after a sufficient period of "woe is me," I finally decided, that since there is nothing I can do about it, it is time for me to stop moping and embrace my poochy tummy. I'm excited to have a baby, so I'm going to be excited to have a large and rounded abdomen showing evidence of it. OK, this one is going to take some work, but I can at least add it to my goals, along with being more lazy. My morning sickness is starting to get better, so I'm hoping in the next few weeks I'll be rid of it entirely. Top Ramen is still good, but not the delicacy it once was. Maybe that's proof that I'm getting out of the morning sick phase. Here's hoping!

Today Dave is off to Taiwan and Singapore to try to fix problems for some very unhappy customers. Never mind that he had nothing to do with creating the mess that he is off to try and fix.... Hopefully he has a good trip and we survive without him.

Karen

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Quotes of the Week:

Jared (to Camryn): I asked Allie if she was going to the Q and U wedding and she didn't even know what it was!! (laughter)

Jared: Mom, I'm almost really famous. Half of a lot of people know me.

Camryn: I really liked-ed the Q and U wedding! It was so fun.

Camryn made the following sign, written on a paper: "DUC HAPE BFTA" [Duck Happy Birthday]. Then she handed me the paper and said, "Mom, can you staple this? It's not for me. It's for my duck. He needs to wear his Happy Birthday crown." ... "NOOOOO!!! Don't staple it like that! That's the way my duck has to go in it!!"

Jared made a book this week called: "I Wish I cood [could] go to the moon:"

"I wish i cood go to the moon [picture of him and Jared asleep in bunk beds with him dreaming about the moon]
'1 day i went to the moon" [Picture of mom and dad standing in front of the house looking sad]
"Wen I got to spase I so the moon" [when i got to space I saw the moon-- picture of rocket flying to the moon]
"Wen I got to the moon I plad" [when I got to the moon I played-- picture of Jared driving a car on top of the moon]
"Soon it wus time to leve." [Soon it was time to leave]
"I went home" [picture of rocket flying back to our house with a very happy mom and dad standing outside.]
"I had lots uv fun" [I had lots of fun-- picture of Jared and Camryn asleep in bunk beds]
"The next day my sister wonted me to tel hr ubawt the moon. the end." [the next day my sister wanted me to tell her about the moon. The End.-- picture of Jared telling Camryn "I had a lot of fun"

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